Mom

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Mom

I just became an orphan.  I tend not to write about other people without their permission, but I have a few words to say about Doris Ruth Miller.  First of all, she was a saint.  I’m often accused of putting the needs of others before my own, and this is something I learned from Mom.  She set me on my lifelong course of reading the Bible, determining, in some inexplicable way, what I call a career.  Mom was born April 7, 1935 in New Jersey.  She was the youngest, and last surviving, of five siblings, and the only girl.  When I reached that age when children (as adults) get curious about their parents, I asked what town she was born in.  By that stage she couldn’t recall, but at one point she told me Cherry Hill, and at another, Asbury Park.  She never finished high school and never had any job training.  But she always believed.  She was faith personified.

She married to get away from a difficult relationship with her own mother.  My father, who died twenty years ago, was an alcoholic.  They had three sons together.  Mom, very aware of Dad’s condition, didn’t believe in divorce and stayed with him until she no longer felt safe doing so.  Not for herself, but for her sons.  Her life revolved around her children.  She eventually remarried and her final son was born.  This marriage involved a move to Rouseville, Pennsylvania—I’ve written about it before—my last childhood home.  Neither of her marriages were happy ones, but she was determined about two things: maintaining her faith, and caring for her children.  She believed unquestioningly and the only book I ever saw her read for herself was the Bible.

I only found out over the weekend that she was in rapid decline.  Circumstances (medical and financial) had kept us away for far longer than I would’ve liked or hoped.  I talked to her on the phone nearly every other day and told her with joy just about a month ago that we had finally got a car that would enable a visit.  We were planning on spending Thanksgiving with her.  The universe, which operates on its own timetable, had different plans.  Mom was a remarkable woman.  She was not afraid of death and she embodied these famous words from Paul of Tarsus: “O death, where is thy sting? O grave, where is thy victory?”  Mom lived eighty-eight difficult years.  She dedicated her life to others and lived the Gospel by example.  I miss her terribly, but I have no doubts about her being among the saints.  Thanks for life, Mom, and for showing how to love unconditionally.

Loco Locusts

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It really used to bother me.  Other kids in kindergarten or first grade called them “crabs.”  The picture, however, clearly showed a lobster.  Quiet and introverted, at least I knew how to tell apart basic body plans.  It’s a weakness I’ve always had—the need to correctly identify.  This didn’t come from my family, who really seem not to be bothered about such things.  It came from somewhere deep inside.  A lobster is not a crab.  The same applied to toads and frogs, or any number of other fine distinctions.  Now I confess that I try to stay away from Nextdoor.com.  It seems that no matter what anyone writes the comments immediately turn political and belligerent.  Such is our world.  But when someone can’t identify an animal, that’s clickbait to me.  I just have to take a peek.

A couple of months back a woman posted a photo of a cicada.  I didn’t chime in because at least thirty other people already had.  The thing was, several locals said it was a locust.  Even after previous commenters had sent helpful links showing the difference between a cicada and a locust.  Probably it comes from many years of teaching biblical studies, but I couldn’t believe anyone would misidentify a locust.  Mind you, when I taught the book of Joel we talked quite a bit about locusts—they are amazing creatures.  In a pre-market economy, they were also deadly.  They don’t attack people like they do in horror films, but they will eat every green leaf for as far as the eye can see.  They travel in huge swarms, capable of blocking out the sun when they fly overhead.  Cicadas are harmless.  Noisy but harmless.

Cicada. Image credit: R. E. Snodgrass, public domain, vía Wikimedia Commons

How someone can live in the world and not care to know the other things that surround them I cannot fathom.  I can understand mistaking similar creatures—some animal mimics can be incredibly effective.  A locust, however, looks nothing like a cicada.  They’re both insects, yes, and they both have wings.  The similarity stops there.  Life is complicated, I know.  There’s a lot to learn.  As a writer one of the things constantly using up my time is trying to find the right name for a thing I know by sight but have never heard called by its noun.  With the internet, identification of critters has become somewhat easier.  But only somewhat.  You have to know where to start.  I still have the well-thumbed animal identification books from my childhood.  Outdated, yes.  Coming apart at the spine?  Definitely.  Full of childhood memories of learning what things are?  Of course.

Creeping Again

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The morality of Creepshow 2 is pretty straightforward.  Of course, this is early Stephen King.  Sometimes it’s good to keep things simple.  Horror anthologies sometimes work and sometimes they don’t.  This one falls somewhere in the middle.  Of course, George Romario didn’t direct, although he wrote the screenplay.  And King didn’t write the screenplay, as in the first installment, but he shows up for a bit part.  Campy and funny, as the first film established, there are a few scary moments, but you get the sense that the bad guys deserve what they get.  There are only three regular segments, apart from the cartoon framing, each with a “do something bad, get punished” theme.  “Old Chief Wood’nhead” seems to start out insensitively to First Nations people, but it features an avenging statue “cigar store Indian” whole doles out justice.  It’s the most disturbing of the three segments since the robbers show no human compassion at all.  Of course, the chief gets them.

“The Raft” features less obviously bad protagonists.  Four teens drive out to an isolated lake with a swimming platform (the eponymous raft) in the center.  They all get high on their way there, and it’s clear the guys want to get their girls to the raft to have sex with them.  A mysterious floating blob surrounds the raft and eats them one by one.  You start to think Randy might survive for being good but when left alone with Laverne (his best friend’s girl) he begins to seduce her while she’s asleep.  None of them survive.  The last segment, “The Hitch-hiker,” follows a woman who’s having an affair.  Late getting home, she hits a, well, hitch-hiker and ends up as his victim.

The Creepshow franchise is, of course, comedy horror.  This film does end with a moralizing message that comic books don’t lead to juvenile delinquency, but rather other factors do.  This feels like an important message in days of increasing efforts to ban books.  Easy solutions by unthinking adults never solve the “problems” they hope to address.  Often what it comes down to is an aesthetic difference rather than true morality.  Morals don’t fit across the board, especially if you don’t think through your own motivations.  Of course, it’s nice to have a movie where such deep thinking isn’t really required.  Kids being eaten alive for being kids may be a bit harsh, but the others in this pleasant little diversion really just get what’s coming to them, and right soon.

Calculating Christians

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I know some calculating Christians.  I use “Christian” as religion scholars do—it is the way people identify themselves, not necessarily what they are.  For example, I grew up learning that Christianity was God’s excuse for throwing a bunch of unknowing people into Hell.  Laughter all around!  Then I did something radical.  I started reading the Bible.  Spoiler alert: as you start to get near the end, you learn that Jesus and his early followers (except maybe Paul) promoted the idea that God is love and the only correct response to that is to love other people.  Of course, a religious founder, deity or not, can’t control what his/her followers will do.  Christianity quickly became judgmental.  “I’m going to Heaven and you’re not!”  Laughter all around!  In my life I’ve been the recipient of calculating Christians more than once.

Calculating Christians are those who, like ein U-boat Kapitän, try to figure out the best way to do the most damage to those they don’t like.  They will destroy your career—torpedoes away!—and then get on their knees to thank their vengeful god for sinking a satanic vessel.  And all the lives of Christians onboard are counted as collateral damage.  God’s good at sorting things out.  Laughter all around!  I’ve also known “Christians” who will target a family member when he’s down, and stressed out to the max, only to tell him he’s going to Hell and they’re just fine with it.  Laughter all around!  They do this without ever asking about the two seriously ill people in a family of three, or how you’re doing with that therapy you’ve had to start.  Jesus would do no less than kick a confessing sinner when he’s down.

There’s a reason Christianity is developing a bad name.  With the first compassionate Pope in centuries we find doctrinaire Catholics condemning his compassion.  Among the Fundamentalist camp we find those who would gladly die for the most hate-filled politician ever elected on these shores.  Calculating the end of the world is, after all, a tiring activity.  No matter that you’re wrong (you never consider the possibility and you never, ever try to weigh the facts), you calculate how to blow it up for everybody.  Laughter all around!  The only thing that keeps me sane, I believe, is knowing that many actual Christians out there know that such actions are taking God’s name in vain.  And that, they know, is against the commandments so prominently placed on courthouse lawns.

Pietro Perugino, The Crucifixion with the Virgin, Saint John, Saint Jerome, and Saint Mary Magdalene [middle panel], public domain, via Wikimedia Commons

Simple Arithmetic?

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Arithmetic progressions.  They can boggle the mind.  I think I’ve noted before—I’ve been doing this so long that it’s difficult to be sure—that the exponential increase of ancestors is astounding.  We have two parents but by the time we add ten greats to the grandparents we’ve got a crowd larger than the small town I grew up in.  Typical of a child of an alcoholic, I have no idea of what normal is, but I’ve had a rare and precious gift more than once in my life, and that has been finding that I had hidden family.  My father, unable to afford child support, made his way back to his family to survive.  Nobody in my household knew that he’d done that.  In fact, I had no idea he had siblings and I had unknown cousins.  It was a gift to discover that just as I was graduating from high school.  My mother encouraged me to stay in touch with them.  That was the reason behind my recent brief trip to South Carolina.

A few years back I learned that I had a cousin on my mother’s side that nobody in my family knew of.  People drift apart, even in families, and some people have to be rediscovered.  Call it redemption.  That’s what it feels the most like.  This cousin made the effort to travel across the country, in part to see me.  Kinship is like that.  Families feel for each other.  Being long apart can raise questions of motivation.  It’s awkward when, due to circumstances, you can’t see someone for some time.  I have a half-sibling in that boat and have recently re-connected.  I can only say that it feels like being a prodigal coming home.

I suppose that in a perfect world families would have no dysfunctional members, and everybody’d live next to each other in harmony and good will.  Right, Pangloss?  Economic circumstances would never force someone to live near where jobs might be found, and nobody would ever marry someone from another state, let alone half-way across the country.  And marriages sometimes double the arithmetic progressions, sometimes perhaps triple or more.  Families are complex and complicated, in reality.  I’ve seen pain in more eyes, and heard it in more voices than I would care to.  And I have a very difficult time letting such things go.  Charlie Bucket, according to Tim Burton’s version, says that families make you feel better in an imperfect world.  A world in which family reunions take place with individuals not being notified.  A world in which arithmetic progressions are mere fictions. Never in a perfect world like ours.

Of Wolves and Humans

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Time has a funny way of distorting perceptions.  I remember when The Wolfman (2010; please, I’m not old enough to have seen the classic initial release in 1941) came out.  I’d already started this blog by then, and I was occasionally watching and writing about horror movies.  Initial reports said this reboot was too violent and bloody.  I had the impression that it’d done well at the box office, but I didn’t see it.  I found a used copy on DVD several years later and still I waited to watch it, a bit afraid from the initial assessments I’d read.  (I tend not to read reviews or watch trailers before seeing a movie—I prefer to come in fresh.)  All of this is to say I finally got around to seeing The Wolfman and I was disappointed.  I really wanted to like it too.  The wolf man was my favorite classic monster as a kid.

I do need to praise the gothic setting and landscape cinematography.  This is beautiful and well done.  Part of the problem is the way the story is changed.  Another is that, apart from The Silence of the Lambs, Anthony Hopkins doesn’t seem to fit the horror genre very well.  Claude Rains made a believable Sir John Talbot, despite being so much smaller than Lon Chaney.  Hopkins has trouble pulling it off.  It could be poor directing, I suppose, but it was difficult to take him seriously.  And two werewolves?  That suggests just a little too much CGI.  Still, there are some good moments.  I did appreciate Sir John encouraging his son to let the wolf run free.  I suppose if you’ve got a werewolf issue, having a dad to talk you through it would be a good thing.

Werewolves, like most classic monsters, are thinly disguised psychological tendencies.  Civilization isn’t always easy, even for social animals like our own species.  There’s a werewolf inside.  Transformation, however, always suggested redemption to me.  The ability to become something better.  I saw The Wolf Man as a parable.  That may have been unusual for a kid, but when religion and monsters come together strange things can happen.  The wolf may be angry, but it need not be dangerous.  It turns out that I really didn’t have to wait thirteen years to see this movie.  I’ll probably watch it again for the points it scores on the gothic scale.  The action features aren’t necessary for a good monster flick, though.  The 1941 version worked just fine.

Starting October

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October’s a difficult month to quantify.  When it rolls around I get in the mood for certain books and movies, but I like to see and read new things.  I check lists to see what others recommend for what I hope is a similar mood.  A book that kept coming up was Roger Zelazny’s A Night in the Lonesome October.  Published thirty years ago, it’s not exactly new, but it was new to me.  It’s a humorous story, told by Snuff, a dog.  But not just any dog—he’s a player in a game that takes place when the full moon lines up with Halloween.  There’ll be spoilers hereafter.  The game involves two sides deciding the fate of the world, and each has the usual monsters lined up.  Dracula, the wolf man, Frankenstein’s monster and others are involved.  One side tries to awaken Lovecraft’s Old Gods and destroy the world while the other side tries to stop them.

Each chapter is a day in October and what the game is is only slowly revealed.  The antagonist for all of this is really the parson.  It turns out that he’s a minister for the Old Gods’ true believers.  Various monsters or players are killed and Sherlock Holmes is hanging about, trying to solve the mystery.  The story’s really a mash-up of several characters from yesteryear.  It’s not scary, nor is it particularly moody.  It’s a good example, however, of how religion and horror, even if it’s comedy horror, work together.  The Old Gods are an existential threat and require clergy to perform the correct rituals.  Roger Zelazny was fond of using characters from existing mythologies in telling sci-fi-ish stories, and this fits that writing mode.

This is an enjoyable story, but my October mood isn’t only a monster one.  Set in England, A Night in the Lonesome October doesn’t really have the leaves, pumpkins, and ghosts of my melancholy season.  Also, the humorous aspect is fine, but acts as a distraction from what I generally seek.  This is a magical time in northern climes.  Of course, I read a good deal of this while traveling to and from South Carolina, so getting the right mood was tricky when it’s beach weather and the flowers are still in bloom.  October means different things to different people, I know.  I’m still looking for the novel that manages to encapsulate my experience of it.  There’s something difficult to quantify about it, and that’s perhaps what I need to define.  

Down to the Sea in Ships

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On the final day of our Charleston odyssey we toured the USS Yorktown, an aircraft carrier dry-docked at Point Pleasant.  One of my uncles served on the Yorktown between the Korean and Vietnam wars and was able to show us around.  What really struck me, as often does with military matters, is just how advanced our engineering is when it comes to war.  The aircraft carrier was invented to meet a belligerent need: to convey aircraft close enough to other nations to support air strikes against “targets” there.  These targets consist of living, breathing human beings, at least in part.  But the technical problems, where I’d rather focus this post, were formidable.  How do you land a plane moving at 200 miles per hour on a moving ship with limited runway?  And how do you do it without tearing the plane apart from the sudden deceleration?

Carriers have steel cables stretched across the landing strip.  A tail hook on the plane, or later jet, would catch a cable, wound several times below deck to increase the ratio of force (as with a pulley), to add enough play to stop a plane without the forward motion tearing it apart.  Five cables stretched across the deck and the ideal was to catch the third one for an optimal landing.  Each landing (which could take place 30 seconds apart) was filmed and analyzed for improvements.  Listening to the technical nature of all this, and knowing that such things had been invented some eighty years ago, made me wonder, yet again, at how creative human beings are.  And made me ponder why so much of our creativity goes toward war machines.  Just think of the problems we could solve if we all worked together!  Instead, Putin covets Ukraine, Trump covets everything, and we fall in line behind them.

I’ve written on such topics before.  I took a self-tour of the USS Midway while in San Diego as part of a business trip back in 2014.  The tech there was perhaps a bit more advanced as this was a nuclear carrier.  Standing on this deck, however, thinking how this one ship costs more than I will earn with a lifetime of education and employment, leaves me a bit reflective.  Those who push for wars are often those on their knees praying for the second coming.  The rest of us, content with the first coming, think how the message of love and peace seems to have been swallowed by a whale.  But this ship is larger than any whale, and, I’m told, much, much more expensive.

Swamp Things

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If I have time, before I go on a trip I like to consider what different flora and fauna I might see.  People from southern states traveling north to Pennsylvania would likely not see too much that they can’t see at home, I expect.  South Carolina, however, is far enough south to hold what seem (to me) to be exotic species.  These are things that are probably pretty quotidian here, but to a traveler they really stand out.  My family had hoped to see an alligator, in a safe way, as long as we were here.  That’s why we ended up at the Audubon Swamp Garden on the Magnolia Plantation just outside Charleston.  Although it’s October, it’s still warm here and although it took some time we eventually spotted a fair sized gator sunning itself many yards away.  After seeing the first one you kind of know what to look for and we ended up spotting four more.

This swamp has a walkway intended to keep visitors safe, so we followed it through the facility.  You have to pass a kind of Jurassic Park entry gate to get in, and it may be best to reflect later that alligators have been around since the dinosaurs.  There were plenty of other animals too.  Our first encounter was a snowy egret.  This was followed shortly by an anole, but my lizard species identification isn’t very developed, I’m afraid.  There were dozens of turtles sunning themselves—several quite large—and a blue tailed skink.  And spiders of apocalyptic size.  My phone camera didn’t zoom in much on the gators, so I’ll put the anole here for you to enjoy.

This iconic swamp was used in the filming of Swamp Thing (I couldn’t resist), and is rumored to have been the inspiration for Shrek’s swamp in that movie.  The most poignant aspect to me, however, was just how much beautiful diversity the world allows if people aren’t constantly trying to improve it.  When a field in my native Pennsylvania is left to its own devices, it will likely become a forest and all the usual suspects will come back.  We do still have elk in some northern counties.  Yes, I suspect if we left swamps run wild mosquitos and other less fun species would also proliferate, but still, there are places that are transcendent for not having been improved upon.  The Audubon Swamp Garden is one such place, although the sunning platforms allow us to see some of the creatures, and with an alligator just a few yards away, I am grateful for this raised walkway.

Poe’s Charleston

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The first thing that came to mind, apart from family, when I learned we were coming to Charleston, is Edgar Allan Poe.  I learned about Poe from my brother at a young age and he may be the earliest author I recognized.  Over the years I’ve visited his birthplace memorial in Boston, his college dorm room in Charlottesville, his house in Philadelphia, and his grave in Baltimore.  I did visit Richmond a quarter century ago, but I had a migraine that day and couldn’t think straight.  When I heard “Charleston,” I immediately recalled that Poe had been here.  He was stationed at Fort Moultrie on Sullivan’s Island, not far from where we’re staying.  As in many cities that Poe called home, he’s become a favorite son of Charleston.  I knew we wouldn’t be able to see all the haunts—I don’t think the larger family shares my fascination—but we got a start before the reunion began.

The first stop was the most tenuous.  Rumor has long had it that Annabel Lee, of Poe’s last complete poem, is buried in the cemetery of the Unitarian Church.  The cemetery is renowned for its flora, which are kept largely untrimmed to match original wishes.  It proved an atmospheric place even on a sunny day.  Then it was a trip to Fort Moultrie itself, where Poe would’ve wandered as a young man.  The thick walls and largely subterranean emplacement would’ve been impressive in the days before modern warfare.  In fact, with the large military presence here, war seems an accepted fact of life.  We didn’t have time to find the Edgar Allan Poe Library, but we were honored to eat in his presence at Poe’s Tavern.  This spot makes it into travel books not because Poe ate here, but because its decor is all Poe-themed.

This journey has been a voyage of discovery.  Our first night in Charleston I had probing dreams about my father.  They actually began a couple days before our flight.  Like Poe, my father had a problem with alcohol.  Like Poe, I never really knew him personally.  Although Joseph Campbell’s overblown, I believe he’s right that the hero’s journey is the search for the father.  Critics sometimes complain that they don’t understand my integration of Poe in my nonfiction books on horror films.  My only defense is that something deeply personal is going on.  This odyssey began over half a century ago, in my childhood, and coming here, I knew that I had to meet the man and claim my heritage.

Valuable Time

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Those who know me are sometimes surprised to learn that I’m half southern, genetically, at least.  My father was a South Carolinian and so I find myself in Charleston, wondering at how I got here.  At least in the short term, it was a long trip.  We left the house at 4 a.m. yesterday and arrived in Charleston some ten hours later.  (The time in the sky was, of course, less than two-and-a-half hours.)  Our initial flight was delayed for two hours, while, in the gate next door another airplane, from the same airline, to the same hub, scheduled an hour-and-a-half later than our flight, left on time.  I sighed as I read the prominent sign ironically reading “Your time is valuable.”  Yes, it is.  And although the ABE (Allentown, Bethlehem, Easton) airport is nice enough, I think I could’ve used a couple more hours abed instead.

It must be quite a logistics nightmare when a plane breaks down.  It’s not like a bunch of spare jets sits in the Lehigh Valley, awaiting the eventuality of some mechanical failure.  Not only do you need a plane, but also a crew that consists of people scheduled to end up in a set location.  In this case they had to fly a jet up from Philadelphia, and then muster a crew to get us on the first leg.  Fortunately, they knew about the delay when we checked in and put us on a later flight to Charleston.  I wonder if our stranded original crew, wherever they were, are still there.

I often think about how long-distance travel follows a chiastic pattern.  You start by walking from your domicile to your car.  You park the car for a larger vehicle that can only land, or dock, in specified locations.  You arrive at such a location, get a car—or you know somebody with one—to take you to your destination where you walk inside.  It’s the in-betweens that take the vast majority of the time.  It’s really amazing that we can do this at all.  I’m in Charleston for a family reunion.  I haven’t been to South Carolina for about two decades—last time was for my father’s funeral.  But this is our vacation for the year.  A chance to see someplace new.  And, given the September we’ve had, to feel a little warmth.  Connecting is important.  Airports help make this possible in the world of the 9-2-5 job that doesn’t, it turns out, offer days off.  Your time is valuable.  It’s worth ten hours of traveling, and then some.

Squidish

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I was attracted to the Lovecraftian aspect of the title.  Of Tentacles, I mean.  I wasn’t aware that Into the Dark was a Hulu series of television shows based on holiday horror.  I watched Pure without realizing that.  Movies these days are complicated.  In any case, Tentacles caught my attention and although it isn’t a tier-one horror film, it’s fun in its own way.  Tara, a desperate young woman, is looking to buy a house.  She finds Sam, who’s trying to sell his parents’ place and seduces him into letting her renovate it.  The two fall in love and Tara reveals she’s being stalked by an ex.  Sam has, however, come down with an illness that doctors can’t identify.  Something is putting tentacles into his ears as he sleeps.  It doesn’t take long to figure out that Tara’s not what she claims to be.  She’s some kind of creature that originated in the ocean, but survives on land by taking part of her victims and slowly becoming their double.  The original, of course, must be disposed of.

This is a serviceable little movie.  The acting is good, particularly on Tara’s part.  There’s enough mystery and energy to keep viewers engaged, despite the commercials.  It also made me realize that Into the Dark might be worth exploring a little more intentionally.  When I went to my usual places to find out more about what I’d just watched, it was a little tricky.  To find the write-up on IMDb you needed to find the series title first so that you could click onto the individual episode.  This is so different than either the major studios or independent filmmakers.  Streaming services, however, have been offering some good home-grown horror.  I’ve seen some notable examples from Netflix, Amazon, and, of course, Hulu.

Anything with tentacles seems to have a tangible Lovecraft connection these days.  In large part it seems to be because of the internet success of Cthulhu.  Those who spend lots of time online know who the Old One is without having ever read H. P. or having watched horror.  He’s become the monster with tentacles, something my college sci-fi professor would doubtlessly have commented upon.  Lovecraft himself would have, I suspect, enjoyed the notoriety but would likely have felt some disappointment regarding the point he was trying to get across.  (That’s more evident in Older Gods.)  The vacuousness of being alone in a meaningless universe was more his aesthetic.  Still, it inspired some fun films for a sleepy weekend afternoon, and its tentacles keep on reaching.

Reflecting Spirituality

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I always find undergoing anesthesia a spiritual experience.  It’s too bad the the prep for things like colonoscopies is so stressful that it’s difficult to appreciate the fasting and how it changes your perceptions.  This is followed by the delicious blackness of a complete loss of consciousness.  If death’s like this we have nothing to fear.  I’ve written about this before, but chemical sleep is not like nighttime sleep.  You hear the anesthesiologist say, “You’re going to sleep now.”  Then you wake up, disoriented because no time has passed.  I blinked a few times, saw my wife’s coat on the wall, and thought it was a nurse.  I started to say “Stop, I’m waking up!”  But then I focused on my wife and wondered why they’d let her into the procedure room.  “Are they done already?”  I asked.  Where had I been for the last hour?

Spiritual experiences are sometimes only seen in retrospect.  They jar us out of ordinary time into an alternative time.  It doesn’t make up for the nasty taste of prep medicine, or the unpleasantness associated with it, but emptying yourself is a spiritual practice.  I need to try to remember that next time around.  I know people who are afraid of anesthesia.  I’ve only had it three or four times—oral surgeries, and my first such procedure as this—but there’s something mystical about it.  I don’t use drugs (never have) so perhaps I’m a neophyte, but looking back on the experience I know that something extraordinary happened.  Coming out of it is coming into a new world that is somehow strangely the same as the one I left.

Religion has always, at least partially, been about altered states of perception.  Organized religion succeeds in making it rote, but those who experience the naked phenomenon never forget it.  Anesthesia is, I know, potentially dangerous.  It so like a light being switched off that I’m always left in awe of it.  Mystical experiences are rare, which is one of the things that makes them so valuable.  I’ve had them—widely spaced—since childhood.  Sometimes it’s evident in the moment, but often some reflection is necessary.  I suppose few people look forward to any kind of surgical procedure, but there can be benefits beyond the physical health that we hope will result.  That’s the way spiritual events often take place.  Perhaps advanced practitioners (not always clergy) can bring them about intentionally, but any of us might recognize them afterwards, upon reflection.

Beautiful Vampire

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It’s been a quest years in the making.  I first found the Dark Shadows novels by Marilyn Ross at the Goodwill Store in Seneca, Pennsylvania.  The series had recently finished its television run and, as this was a used book bin, and limited in size, you could never tell what you might find.  My teenage self, fascinated by vampire lore, eagerly read those I could find.  I got rid of the volumes I had when I attended college and began to miss them when I was old enough to admit such things.  It took at least fifteen years to locate all of them, and now, for the first time in my life, I have read the entire series.  Barnabas, Quentin and the Vampire Beauty isn’t always easy to find.  I certainly hadn’t read it before.  Not that it’s high art—the campiness shows through the gothic setting from time-to-time—and yet it’s an accomplishment.

This particular story again shows some development from what had gone before.  The vampire beauty is a young woman tricked into having weight reduction surgery in Switzerland.  The surgery, naturally enough, transforms her into a vampire.  She needs help so she seeks out Barnabas Collins, which leads her to Collinwood.  From there a set of adventures head toward the typical climax of this series of books.  Nevertheless, W. E. D. Ross seems to have shown some improvement over the thirty-two novels in the series.  This story seems less similar to others in the series as a whole.  Quite a bit of effort is spent on trying to find a vampire cure, but for Adele Marriot rather that Barnabas Collins.

I have to wonder if Ross knew this would be the last Dark Shadows book he would write for the series.  He did write other gothic fiction, and even a novelization of the movie, House of Dark Shadows, but the initial series ends with a kind of knowing that we’ve reached the end of something.  Was he told by someone at Paperback Library, “Hey, we’re pulling the plug on the series” or did he simply run out of steam?  The daily television show ran for about 1225 episodes.  This original novel series had far fewer.  Still, the thrill of hunting all of them down, lining them on my shelf, and then reading them in order was a rare pleasure.  It was a recapturing of, perhaps even a completing of, part of my childhood.  It may have taken decades to accomplish, but an accomplishment is an accomplishment.

Gods and Crafts

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Those of us who write fiction, I suppose, often ponder what it would be like having a kind of writing named after us.  Knowing that’s not likely to happen we might cast an envious eye toward, say Lovecraftian horror, which has become a sub-genre in its own right.  When a friend pointed me to Older Gods, an independent Lovecraftian horror film shot in Wales, I was glad to see it already out on a free streaming site (with commercials, of course).  Winner of several accolades, the movie isn’t easily understood although the plot is fairly simple.  A man has gone to Wales to find answers regarding a lifelong friend’s suicide there.  A recorded message tries to explain what this friend had stumbled upon that led him to his extreme act.  A world-wide underground religion is attempting to awake one of the older gods to bring about the end of the world.

The problem is these devotees of the older gods—one deity in particular, called “The Origin”—hunt down anyone who learns about them.  They give them the choice to join or to have their families killed, followed by themselves.  If they do join, it hastens the end of the world.  In other words, the engine driving this movie is religion.  Shot with a very low budget over a very short span of time, it manages not to fall into the “bad movie” category, and actually edges into the “good” category.  The film crew, reportedly, numbered only seven (no extensive credit roll here), and the story is based on a premise introduced by H. P. Lovecraft.  The older gods, who care nothing for humans, are asleep beneath the sea, awaiting the signal to awake.

Since this movie was only recently released, not much in the way of online summaries is yet available.  The reason this might be important is that Lovecraftian narrators not infrequently go insane.  In other words, is our protagonist a reliable narrator or not?  Did he, like his deceased best friend, go insane?  This is never resolved.  Those devoted to the religion of the older gods are unrelenting.  Lovecraft, famously an atheist, knew the power of religious belief.  His nihilistic universe included a scary place for believers.  When these themes come together, with or without tentacles, we seem to be in territory named after its creator.  Older Gods is a slower paced, thoughtful film that leaves you unsettled.  And there’s no doubt regarding its true origin.